Things that make me laugh

1. Jen...so what? wanna fight about it?
2. Funny Quotes "I caught you a delishous bass"
3. National Lampoons Christmas Vacation...Exterior Illumination
4. The Grinch...It's not a dress, it's a kilt....sicko
5. Angie when she's in one of her moods
6. Krista's gas
7. Nipple Nibblers
8. Stories of the goings on in the O'Neil House
9. All people at Build-A-Bear Workship...funniest job ever!!! Shout outs to Erica, Jerrika and Edina.
10. Get Fuzzy

You're still there

I still think about you, and I still remember when. I wouldn't say I want it again, nor would I say I want something similar, I just want to say something and put it out there that its always been you. It's probably this time of year; so many memories are linked to you that you are in my thoughts. It's better that we're not together and it's better that I'm on my own, finding my own way, but there are times that I can't help but think that you're going to come back and all of our problems will have magically worked themselves out. You have always been the best person in the world for me...in theory.

Almost time...

Ok, I've been worn down...I'll update! hahahaha, anyhoo! Right now I am sooo excited about Saturday! Saturday is the first official Christmas Movie Night (first official because its happened many time before but this is the first time there was a planned party for it). Well, lets just be honest....it was actually just decided that Saturday would be the Christmas movie night and I've gone slightly overboard...hahahahaha I bought new decorations, I'm making homemade hot chocolate, and bought little presents for everyone. Gosh...I'm really excited about it! I love being the hostess!!!

I'm gonna be home in 13 days!! I'm really excited about that! I have pretty much every moment planned, which is good and bad at the same time. One of the best things about being at home is laying in my bed and just reading and being alone...and because I'm home for SUCH a short time I don't really have time for that. Stupid Work....makes me come back to BC too early. On the plus side, Jen is coming back with me! Honesytly, its weird but I think I'm more excited about her coming here than I am about going home. I just feel like I can finally show my new world to my old world. It's like, home will always be there...my mom and my dad and my sisters and my nephew and my aunt and uncle and grammie obviously are so special, and that's the thing...I know they love me and want me to do what's best for me. Now, I get to show someone that I am doing what's good for me. I can show people that I'm good here....here is good for me.

It's weird, but I've been noticing how at home I am in Vancouver recently. I get in a cab and tell the driver the fastest way to get somewhere; drop me somewhere downtown and I can probably get myself home; I have good friends who live all over the lower mainland...not just SFU friends now (not that I don't love my SFU friends.....that's you Dot); I've been here alone for about four and a half years, and I love it. I'm lonely sometimes and I miss home, but I think I may be making another home here...A home for me...not my family home. How scary is that? I can identify with something now other than being Aunt Melissa from Nova Scotia. I guess it's all part of growing up...you know...I am getting old....seriously...time, time has ravaged my once youthful face....


And something to make you smile...

Eternal Sunshine

I just wanted to go on record as having a HUGE desire to watch "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" Again....such and amazing movie!

I hate cakes

You are Summer Wheatley and you hate cake.

Which Napoleon Dynamite character are you?
brought to you by

THAT'S IT?!?

Today was the day...the day I left behind the gentle teachings of my small town upbringing. Today I finally joined the ranks of my big-city sisters and got a bikini wax.

For the longest time the reasoning excluded me...why would anyone in their right mind take hot, steaming wax smear it on their pubic region (a region that is home to billions and billions of nerve endings) take some cotton and put that on the hot wax to attach itself and then, literally, RIP the hairs out?! Why?!? Had no one ever heard of a razor and its effectivness when used correctly with shaving cream? This idea made no sense to me. Waxing your eyebrows is one thing...teensy tiny area, but your bikini line? That special area that makes you wonderful? You are supposed to treat it with respect, treat it nicely and in turn it will treat you very, very well.

I suppose you're wondering how a girl with such a defined opinion of bikini waxing gets talked into putting herself through that torture. Well, I'll tell you. I didn't want my roommate to think I was a chicken. We had talked about it. We had discussed it like it was no big deal. When she finally made me pin down a time to go, when she finally made me phone and make an appointment, there was no way I could let her know that I was scared. That I was afraid that it would hurt too much, or that I wasn't entirely comfortable with showing my poonany to some random stranger holding a popsicle stick covered in hot wax!

I was fretting until it was time to go. My stomach was in knots, I felt a little dizzy and I really, really didn't want to walk into that torture den. I didn't care how nice the lighting was or how great it smelled! They weren't going to fool me into a false sense of security! They walk you down a small hallway. They put you in a very small room with paper on the tables. PAPER on the tables!! I had a horrible flash back to my doctors office...I immediately looked for stirrups and the duck lips. You take off your clothes, lie down and blindly trust the woman you met not even 5 minutes ago with your most treasured, sensitive area. As she hovered over me brandishing that dreaded popsicle stick, she tried to make conversation to get me to relax. RELAX?!?! No way was I going to relax!! I was in that horrible situation because of my stupid pride. Once again, felled by pride. As I felt that hot wax being applied to the innocent skin I had nothing left to do but squeeze my eyes closed tight and pray and beg for sanctuary. She asked if I wanted her to countdown…I told her ‘no thanks’, but really I was screaming at her inside, asking her how stupid could she be? Just do it!

She pulled it. She pulled out all of those little tiny hairs that I have been dutifully letting grow. Everything I have been told, everyone who has told me of the excruciating pain, every warning...You all lie! The worst damn part was the anticipation!! I was terrified, I almost let my roommate know what a wimp I am...all because of you spreaders of hateful bikini waxing propaganda! Here is the lesson of my tale: It stings, but it doesn't hurt. If you can get your eyebrows waxed, you can get your bikini line waxed. You're poonany will forgive you and you’ll feel an amazing sense of confidence afterwards…every guy loves me, I’m awesome, Go Me!!

Boys Suck!

I would just like to put all my anger out into the universe right now and remind everyone that BOYS SUCK! They all suck so bad! And they all are horrible, but the really really horrible ones are the ones that act like they are your best friends, but then out of nowhere you find out that they really can't be your best friends because they have lied!! Best friends don't lie!! But apparently Boy Best Friends do lie, so to this I say BOYS SUCK! You all are horrible! God...this is why I refuse to get into a relationship!

An Update

One thing I've never really mastered was the ability to see myself as only myself. For some reason I have always seen myself in many different ways....and I don't think this is a good thing. Instead of seeing one whole, complete Melissa I see a fragmented view of myself. I'm a waitress, I'm a student, I'm reliable, I'm smart, I'm really really funny, I'm quiet, I'm loud, I'm disagreeable, I'm passive, I'm fiesty, I'm laidback, I'm chill, I'm tense, I'm a bearbuilder, I'm great with kids, I lose my patience, I'm a worrier, I'm a sucker for amusement rides, I'm stuck in the past, I'm addicted to the unknown of my future, I'm terrified of commitment, I want more than just sex, I'm a people pleaser, I love saying No, I'm unable to say No, I'm easy to get along with, I'm a difficult person to know, I'm lazy, I'm full of energy....who am I? Some kind of mixed up combination of all of these traits? And if that's so, I'm ok with that...what what is the percentage? How can I really start to know and appreciate myself if I can't even define who I am?

I see my friends finding love and getting married and having babies, but I can't even manage let myself want a relationship beyond a purely sexual one. What is with that? I found the most unavailable emotionally guy I know and decided that he would be the one who I would lose myself in for the summer. And now September has arrived and just like that, I"m finished with him as quickly as it started. Why? Because the fact that I could get hurt scares the shit out of me. So many people seem concerned that I will get hurt with this relationship, but I don't think they see the changes that have occurred within me in the past year. I no longer want to be in that amazing relationship. I don't want to be getting married anytime soon. Giving yourself over to someone else just gives them the power to hurt you, even if they don't mean to. And not only that....it gives youthe power to hurt yourself. No way....I'm decided that relationships are not worth it. From now on, I'll stay with the sex buddies and I'm happy with that. Honestly....I"m happy for all my friends who are getting married and having kids...but I still think your nucking futs. honestly...you are.

Maybe I'm interested in seeing myself as different aspects of a personality because I want to know how others see me as well. How do all the people whose opinions I value see me? Of course I hope they have a good opinion of me, but really...how can I really know? Maybe they see all the faults that I try so so hard to keep hidden. Like the fact that sometimes I think I'm so morally superior to other people. Maybe its not just a moral thing...maybe I just think I'm better sometimes....and that is a horrible way to be. But back to the moral thing...I think I hold too many people to MY moral standards...isn't that a horrible way to be? Honestly....where did I get the idea that people should live up to MY standards? I think its because I feel my values so strongly that the things that I value, I also respect in others. So when they fail to live up to my expectations, I kinda feel let down by them. I hope people up too high...it's only a matter of time before they fall. Maybe that's why I can't define myself either...when I start to get to indepth I start to realize that perhaps, I'm falling too.

interesting......

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.

You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.

In this moment, you think of love as something you can get or discard anytime. You're feeling self centered.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Dear Sir

Dear Mr. 40 year old, fat cook: I know you're just trying to get laid. But lets look at this rationally, shall we? I'm 22....you're 40. You hit on the bus girl the other day. You went out for a beer after work with my best friend and then told everyone you had a date and she's crazy about you. You have a serious attitude problem. You think you're better than EVERYONE and that you're the expert on everything. You refer to me as "One of those smart Nova Scotians", like there are so few. I ask you to fix an order that YOU fucked up and you say to me "Ok...just cause you're hot". Are you freakin kidding me?! Come on....show some kind of brain power...Even if all of the above wasn't true...you didn't hit on everything that moves, you didn't lie about my best friend to all our co-workers, you didn't put down my province (which everyone knows I'm WAAAAY too proud of) and you weren't a cocky bastard....you saying I'm hot would NEVER get you in my pants. Remember, I'm a "smart scotian"...I know that you are nasty, you are old, and you are an asshole.

Dear Mr. Friend: Thank you for your comments about my teeth. I know they are white, I know they are straight, and I also know that they came that way. Yes...It is AMAZING that I haven't had an dental work. Why are you so obsessed about setting up your friends? I mean, I know you're in a relationship...but honestly. Are you one of those crazy people who think that because you are in a happy relationship, that EVERYONE else has to be? And really...since, you're in a relationship and wanting to hook me up with your friends, should you really be hitting on me?

Dear Mr. Friend's Friend: I finally gave you my number. I am shy and I am not used to being set up, but I was convinced by Mr. Friend that you and I would get along amazenly well. I think I was also a little flattered that you said I was "smoken"...I've never been smoken in my life. Thank you...you can't have my virginity (its been gone for awhile), but you did manage to steal my 'smoken' v-card. Thank you for the call...I mean, I wasn't there but you left a message with my crazy and wacky friend. Did she scare you away? I called you back after overcoming a huge shyness barrier, you were not home...I left a message. Never heard from you again. Seriously, did something happen in the few hours between the time you called me and when you got the message I called you back?

Dear Mr. Metro Guy: I'm sorry. This one is my fault. I thought you were so H-O-T!! I made witty conversation daily, I took your free paper and didn't read them. I just needed the excuse to talk to you and make you fall in love with my shy, mysterious, flirty self. You told me about yourself, you started visiting my restaurant in the same sort of way...excuses to walk past to make smoldering eye contact. Star-crossed we were...destined to fail. I got to know you, and found out that not only are you crazy hot, you are aware of it. You're an actor and you are veryvery self-absorbed. You tell me all about yourself, at first I enjoyed learning about you....now I see that you will never be able to love me...you are too in love with yourself. I'm sorry. I still take your paper...and I still don't read them....but I have started to wean you off me...I rarely stay long chatting with you. I'm sorry...If only you were completely different, we could have been wonderful.

Dear Mr. Guy on the Bus: I see you all the time...I see you looking at me when you get on the bus....I see you eyeing me from your seat. Seriously...I think you're cute...that's why I eye you back. I'm a shy gal...you're gonna have to grow some balls and talk to me...it's easy...Its a crowded bus route....sit next to me...make small talk! My main requirement for suitors is CONFIDENCE...if you don't show some, you're gonna end up like Mr. Friends Friend and Mr. Metro Guy and, heaven forbid, Mr. 40 year old, fat cook....you'll be there, but you'll have no chance!

Dear Mr. LaSenza: Why are you working there? I hate it when guys work in stores that are obviously girl shops!! It really makes me uncomfortable when you watch me pick out my underpants. ewww!!! Plus, I saw you fingering the satin-y bras the other day. Seriously dude, that's REALLY creepy.

Dear Random Hot Guy Across the Street: Where did you go?! You brought me many moments of surprise and eye sex. Remember that day we ran into each other when you were on your way to rogers? I do...I remember it vividly...it was softly raining...you were getting a little damp...you were oh so hot....I would have lent you my umbrella if I haven't needed it and if it wasn't hot pink...not really your color. I really miss you...If only I had known you were only visiting, I would have DEFIANTLY forgotten about my 'no one night stands' rule...hell...I would have ENFORCED a 'random sex with HOT neighbour' rule!!

Stay tuned...I have many other creepy/crazy/self obsessed/HOT people in my life. I guess the good thing is: It can only go up from here ;)

What I Miss the Most

I don't know why, but tonight I have been hit with a rather large wave of homesickness. The following is a list of things that I miss (No particular order).....(I actually blame Jen for this homesickness....I miss her!!!!):

1. My mom bringing me back bags of the books from the New Glasgow Library. And then proceeding to stay in bed for days to read them. And yes, I have made excuses to avoid going out with friends, just so I can read.
2. Acropole pizza and donairs....'nuf said.
3. Starr....his fur is so soft and puuuurfect and beautiful and he purrs so loud.
4. Knowing everything there is to know about my town.
5. Jumping in the car when I decide that I want to do something...and then just going and doing it.
6. Anth-a-Doodle...geez...that kid kills me!
7. For some reason...the layout of the Wendy's drive thru!
8. "The Taco".....for all you sickos, my bed is called "the taco"...cause when you lay in it you fall to the middle and the sides come up :D
9. Going down to the store for milk or bread or orange juice.
10. My sea-foam-green bedroom walls.
11. waking up to the smell of bacon.
12. Big bowls of cereal on Saturday mornings
13. Jen...that should be enough explaination. I want my Ren!
14. Drinking too much with Adam and Josh.
15. Going for drives.
16. The Merb
17. The Canada Day Fair.....oh...the great memories of the ferris wheel!
18. Anthony's Funky Toe
19. Stealing Jan's books
20. Annajean's mold mobile
21. Fighting dad for the good spot on the couch.
22. Mom running her fingers in my hair
23. Shopping with Amy...oh the reckless spending..
24. Patti...always so much fun!
25. dancing in the kitchen

I challenge Jen to continue this list with 25 more of her own....

And here come the quotes...

So if you know me at all....you know I am OBSESSED with quotes! I love them. They can bring anything; understanding, faith, inspiration, tears or smiles. So...can anyone tell me who wrote this quote? I know it was a dedication at the beginning of a book, but I have no clue who wrote it! :( I think this quote is BRILLIANT! Something about it hit me and I loooooove it...probably because if you know me well enough to recognise my quote fetish, you probably know me enough to know how I feel about endagered animals....a.k.a We are RUINING our world!!!!!!!!! For God's Sake!!! No one needs a baby monkey and no one needs to have anything made out of ivory!! and its not even people wanting animals and animal parts...Stop cutting down forests to make teak furniture!!! You are ruining the small bit of Orangutan habitat that is left on the Earth!!! GOD! ahem...you've all heard my rant before....

OK! the Quote....

"I sometimes imagine the sound of a shot ringing out, and turn in time to see the last elephant, black rhino, or mountain gorilla slowly sink to its knees in the Red African Dust.

In time that will come to pass and on that day an unbearable loniless will descend over humankind.

To all creatures, still wild and free, I dedicate this book. The success of human evolution has not been kind to you."

Me

So, I wrote this poem when I was line in grade 11, but surprisingly, it still makes me feel better and happy about who I am. I really think it was one of those points in your life that you can actually see things clearly and accept things about yourself.

Me

I have big dreams

but underneath them I have straight teeth.

One of my eyes is a tad smaller than the other. My

fingers are fat and kinda knobby.

I will never be as small as my sister.

My hair is too straight.

All my dreams will probably not come true

but my teeth will always be straight.

My eyes will not change and

my fingers

will always stay the same.

I don't wanna be as thin as my sister.

And my hair is nice

I am Me.

What's interesting is those things that I didn't like about myself then is very different now: I don't think my hair is straight enough and I iron it everyday...my fingers aren't so fat and knobby now, I haven't thought about my eyes in SOOOO long....actually forgot that one was a little smaller and I have great curves...I really don't want to be as thin as my sister.

I guess this really shows how much you will look for to be selfconscious about in high school...I remember now wanting to smile cause it really showed my weird eyes!!! How stupid is that?!? I can't even notice it now and NO ONE ever has ever said..."is one of your eyes a quarter of a millimeter smaller than the other?" :)

Starr

Starr
Originally uploaded by mellalynne.

Isn't he the cutest cat you've ever seen?! Oh Gosh...i miss him so much!!

I am Crap at this Blogging thing!!

There is nothing in this world that will make you feel as crappy as looking through other people's blogs! I was just randomly searching and, my God...some people who have blogs are amazing!! They have cool pictures and cool backgrounds and here I am...stuck with the all templates and picture-less because I'm too stupid to figure out how! :) I generally see myself as a very computer savvy individual, but now I can see that I'm good with computers COMPARED to my family. Compared to the rest of the general population, I'm part of the "lower-middle-class computer-ites"...the people I used to scoff about quietly to myself. Oh...how the mighty have fallen! :)

Also, its so strange to see the people who blog on a regual basis!! Take my friend Jen for example. She is really the only one who actually reads this blog on a regualr basis, and she used to be so keen about the blogging. But now...nothing! Before it was a fun "ohhh...gotta read what's up with her, tell her about me" thing, but now that she's out of it, I'm out of it too!! Jen!! Please!! Come back to blogging!!! I miss your witty commentaries on life, you're constant E.R. obsession...I need more that interesting MSN names to keep me up to date!!

So I had a pretty good weekend, although I do have one minor complaint...well...I guess it has a lot to do with the fact that my friends here in Van-city, do not really know me that well at all. They do, but they don't...they know what I tell them and what they see. Things that Van-city people think are things that realisitically, Nova Scotia people would NEVER thing. Ok, so what brought this on is: I was out at my favourite bar this weekend and I was having a GREAT time!! I was dancing like a fool (Jigs...if you will), having a few drinks, laughing and just having the best night I've had in a loooooong time!! I was tipsy/drunk but by no means, sloppy-falling down-I can't control myself drunk, but for some reason I was being treated as though I was. And I know, how I just described this, it actually sounds like I was falling down drunk, but I honestly wasn't. I was having so much fun, but I was in complete control of myself and my actions. I was honestly just dancing and joking around...I wasn't even flirting or having fun with any guys! Yet...I was being treated like a complete and total lush, who needed a babysitter!! My Nova Scotia friends would NEVER do this! They know the difference from when I'm drinking and having fun and when I'm drinking and really need to go home (Josh especially!!)! I assume its because I'm so much shorter than my friends here, which gives the impression of youth and irresponsibility, but Gosh darn it!!! I'm 22 years old!! Older than everyone else I was out with (save Charlene), and I was being treated like it was my first time drinking!! I just want an evening out with my NS crew, who know me and can read me and can understand that I am just an "all for fun" girl! There is a time for seriousness, and there is a time for fun...out at the Blarney Stone is DEFINATLY a time for fun!

Top 44 Ways to Freak-Out Your Roommate

Top 44 Ways to Freak-Out Your Roommate

1. Smoke ballpoint pens.

2. Smile -- All the time.

3. Always flush the toilet three times..

4. Listen to radio static.

5. Open your window shades before you go to sleep each night. Close them as soon as you wake up.

6. Whenever you go to sleep, starts jumping on your bed . . . do so for a while, then jump really high and act like you hit your head on the ceiling. Crumple onto your bed and fake like you were knocked out . . . use this method to fall asleep...every night for a month.

7. Whenever his/her parents call and ask for your roommate, breathe into the phone for 5 seconds then hang up. .

8.Fake a heart attack. When your roommate gets the paramedics to come, pretend nothing happened.

9. Whenever the phone rings, get up and answer the door

10.Whenever someone knocks, answer the phone.

11. Spend all your money on Transformers. Play with them at night. If your roommate says anything, tell him/her with a straight face, "They're more than meets the eye."

12. Get some hair. Disperse it around your roommate's head while he/she is asleep. Keep a pair of scissors by your bed. Snicker at your roommate every morning.

13. Trash your room when your roommates not around. Then leave and wait for your roommate to come back. When he/she does, walk in and act surprised. Say, "Uh-oh, it looks like THEY were here again."

14. Every time you see your roommate yell, "You son of a..." and kick him/her in the stomach. Then buy him/her some ice cream.

15. Set your roommate's bed on fire. Apologize and explain that you've been watching too much Beavis and Butthead. Do it again. Tell him/her that your not sorry because this time they deserved it.

16. Eat lots of Lucky Charms. Pick out all the yellow moons and stockpile them in the closet. If your roommate inquires, explain that visitors are coming, but you can't say anything more, or you'll have to face the consequences.

17. Draw a tiny, black spot on your arm. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, "It's spreading, it's spreading!"

18. Buy a McDonald's Happy Meal for lunch every day. Eat the straw and the napkin. Throw everything else away.

19. Buy a plant. Sleep with it at night. Talk to it. After a few weeks, start to argue with it loudly. Then yell, "I can't live in the same room with you," storm out of the room and slam the door. Get rid of the plant, but keep the pot. Refuse to discuss the plant ever again.

20. Buy a Jack-In-The-Box. Every day, turn the handle until the clown pops out. Scream continuously for twenty minutes.

21. If your roommate comes home after midnight, hit him/her on the head with a rolling pin. Immediately go to bed, muttering, "Ungrateful little..."

22. Pile dirty dishes in your roommate's bed. Insist that you don't know how they got there.

23. Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

24. While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

25. Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, "He just didn't belong."

26.Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he/she knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.

27. Practice needlepoint every night. At one point, grab your thumb and scream, "Owwwww!" Cry hysterically for a few minutes, and then go back to bed. Sob and sniff all night.

28. Every time your roommate comes in, immediately turn off the lights and go to bed. When he/she leaves, get up and loudly yell, "Okay guys, you can come out now!"

29. Sit in front of a chess board for hours, saying nothing, doing nothing. Then look up and say, "I think this game goes a lot faster with two players."

30. Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."

31. Change the locks on the door. Don't let your roommate in unless he/she says the secret word. Change the secret word often. If your roommate can't guess the secret word, make him/her pay a tithe.

32. Scatter stuffed animals around the room. Put party hats on them. Play loud music. When your roommate walks in, turn off the music, take off the party hats, put away the stuffed animals, and say, "Well, it was fun while it lasted."

33. When you walk into the room, look at the roommate in disgust and yell, "Oh you're here!" Walk away yelling and cursing.

34. Buy a watermelon. Draw a face on it and give it a name. Ask your roommate if the watermelon can sleep in his/her bed. If your roommate says no, drop the watermelon out the window. Make it look like a suicide. Say nasty things about your roommate at the funeral.

35. Draw a chalk outline on the floor. When your roommate comes in, say, "Don't worry. It's not what you think." If he/she asks about it again, immediately change the subject.

36. Drink a cup of coffee every morning. When you finish it, gnaw on the mug for about ten minutes. Then look at your roommate, immediately put the mug away, and quickly leave the room.

37. Set up about twenty plants in an organized formation. When your roommate walks in, pretend to be in the middle of delivering a speech to the plants. Whisper to them, "We'll continue this later," while eyeing your roommate suspiciously.

38. Keep some worms in a shoe box. When doing homework, go and consult with the worms every so often. Then become angry, shouting at the worms that they're stupid and they don't know what they are talking about.

39. Wear a paper hat. Every time your roommate walks in, say, "Welcome to McDonald's, can I take your...Oh, it's just you." Take off the hat, sit, and pout.

40. Go through your roommate's textbooks with a red pen, changing things and making random corrections. If your roommate protests, tell him/her that you just couldn't take it anymore.

41. As soon as your roommate turns off the light at night, begin singing famous operas as loud as you can. When your roommate turns on the light, look around and pretend to be confused.

42.Whenever your roommate sneezes, go and hide in the closet for about an hour. Look around nervously for the rest of the day.

43. Sit and stare at your roommate for hours. Bring others in to join you. Eat peanuts, throwing a few at your roommate. Then say, "Boy, these zoos just aren't what they used to be."

44. Buy a gun. Clean it every day. One day, put a band-aid on your forehead, and refuse to discuss the gun ever again.

Sometimes I feel as though I'm diagonally parked in a parallel world!

Sometimes I feel as though I'm diagonally parked in a parallel world!....and I'm not saying that is a bad thing. I'm just saying that you know, sometimes the things that I take as a given usually are not what I think.

One of my favourite movies is "Labyrinth". The movie's byline is "Where everything seems possible and nothing is what it seems", which is essentially my life right now. I have the entire world at my feet and it seems like I can do anything, but really is it what it seems? Can I actually do anything? Since highschool I have been told that you go to University and you graduate in 4 years and you have a degree and you get a job and you have a life. When I was in high school that was fine and so obvious to me, but now that I'm actually living that life it is scaring the shit out of me! I am not going to graduate in 4 years, I don't know what type of job I want, and I don't know what type of life I should have. So, basically by the standards set forth by high school, I am failing....miserably! So many of my friends are actually graduating in 4 years!!! Where did I go wrong?

I have two jobs that I hate, live farfar away from my family, and have been kinda down lately. I think its because its actually coming into my head that this is it. After trying so hard to find the right kind of life and be the right kind of person this is what I ended up with: I'm not doing so hot at the "University Plan" and I'm scared shitless to make anytype of real change in my life and I really miss my friends from home. You know, the friends that know you so well that if I was to do one of my trademark dumb moves, they would probably understand my motivation. The friends that have known me for so long that I don't really think of them as seperate people in my life, but more so of aspects of myself and of each other. Each so different, but SO essential to me being me. Friends that have always just been there, not demanding, not pushing, no need to act any different because they remember that time when...

So, yeah...that is my angry and bitter rant. Angry and bitter at the way things are shaping up in my life and at the fact that I'm feeling outside of my own happy E.C. life. Don't take this as the be all, end all or course, because as you know, if you know me AT ALL....this is how I feel right now. I guarantee that soon I will have a totally different opinion and feel very lucky to not be trapped by the so-called plan set forth by the evil high school dictators who brainwashed our every step to create anotehr generation of 'yes-men'. This is what I mean by being diagionally parked in a parallel world...its not necessarily a bad thing.....as a matter of fact...maybe its good that I'm taking my time alone and at school to really figure shit out............. ;)

honestly now...

Honestly now...I need some opinions!

I have been told, by a reliable source that I sometimes come across as somewhat "unavailable and snobbish". Now...I would like to clear this misconception up. I am the nicest, friendliest person EVER...I am just insanely shy! This is what is plaguing me...I can't meet guys because I seem unapproachable because I tend to avoid all eye-contact and only talk to my friends. Now, I can see how this method is not working for me. In Fact, I totally agree that I must seem like a bitch. But, I can't help it! I'm a shy girl who is plagued with low self-esteem. I just assume that every guy would much rather talk to my much hotter friends than me, so I try to make it easy for them. Have at 'em! I'll just stay here ignoring you.

So, my question to you is: how did I ever fall into this habit? And how the hell do I get out of it?

Next Order of Business!

What the hell is up with all this 'Cute' business?! Ya know...in highschool, I really enjoyed the cute aspect of my life. BUt now...i'm thinking...I'd like to be hot! or Sexy! or Alluring! Just once!! Anyone of those!! Anything really!! But nope...I'm stuck in the cute category! IT wouldn't be so bad if I could meet guys that were attracted to cute and appreciated me for my cutey-ness...but nope. See above as to why I don't meet any of those :)

So, my question is: Is my level of cuteness going to push me into an eternity of lonely-ness?

OK...final issue! So, what do you do when someone is interested in you that you're REALLY not into? I know I've spend this entire blog bitching about my lack of ability to attract guys...but what I MEANT to say if attract guys who I'M attracted to! Cause I have tons of luck with all the other ones! So, there is this guy who I know (no names!), who is super nice, funny, reasonably attractive and is very into me. But my problem is...I do not feel ANY of those things for him. He's really one of those people who I couldn't care less if we remained friends....to me, he's a casual friend. And I think that's what makes me feel the worst. He deserves someone nice...just not me. :s

And my question is: What do I do? I can't avoid him and I don't want to be bitchy girl. Yikes!

So, yes...any imput is greatly apprechiated!! :D

Back by Popular Demand!

Well...really...by Dorothy's innocently asked question...I'm blogging again...so not really popular demand...but more so...Back by One Question asked by Dorothy!!...it doesn't really have the same ring to it! :D And...in my eternal laziness I've decided that instead of actually writing I'm gonna answer a quiz on here :D you're welcome Dorothy!

1. IF YOU COULD BUILD A HOUSE ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD IT BE?
Ummm...probably somewhere in Nova Scotia...I'm an East Coast girl at heart.

2. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING?
I don't think I have a favourite...well...other than sweat pants :D but...probably my monster pals sweatshirt...or my C.B.G.B's shirt...God i wish it wasn't so trendy..

3. WHAT'S THE LAST CD YOU BOUGHT?
oh No...last CD I bought...ummm...I'm one of those people who are ruining the music industry...It was probably something horribly embarrassing too...I think I"m just gonna go with a blank on this one....get it? a BLANK Cd!!

4. WHAT TIME DO YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?
5:30 am! boooo...I work downtown at 7 :(

5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE KITCHEN APPLIANCE?
ummm...my blender

6. IF YOU COULD PLAY AN INSTRUMENT, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
ummm...I think I would just want to be better at the ones I actually play...

7. FAVORITE COLOR?
ummm...pink...and blue I think...

8. WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SPORTS CAR OR SUV
SUV..I know...I'm killing the environment...

9. DO YOU BELIEVE IN AFTERLIFE?
yes...I just don't have my ideas firmly grasped as of yet.

10. FAVORITE CHILDREN'S BOOK?
like little kid book or young chapter book? well...I was totally into The Babysitters Club...and before that The Babysitter's Club Little Sister Series...it was a stepping stone to the good stuff

11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON?
Fall :) I like the colors and its not too hot and not too cold!

12. IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPER POWER, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
hmmm...I don't know...I don't think I'd like to have a super power, rather I'd prefer to be a super hero and be part of a evil fighting team!! I call being Sailor Moon!!! ;)

13. IF YOU HAVE A TATTOO, WHAT IS IT?
I'm not into the whole forever aspect of a tattoo...honestly...I can't stay in a relationship right now, do you really think I'm qualified for choosing premanent body art?

14. CAN YOU JUGGLE?
meaning...can I throw one item into the air and catch it? ...No...hahahaha kidding, kidding...I kid cause I love.

15. THE ONE PERSON FROM YOUR PAST YOU WISH YOU COULD GO BACK AND TALK TO?
Ummm....I don't know. Can I choose myself? Cause I think I'd like to have a chat with 16 year old Melissa...That would be interesting as hell.

16. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE DAY?
They all kinda blend together when you're not in school...I guess Saturday cause Saturday's can be Blarney Stone days...and I love the Blarney Stone!

17. WHAT'S IN THE TRUNK OF YOUR CAR/TRUCK?
Yeah...I don't have a car...thanks for reminding me that I'm a slave to public transit :D

18. WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SUSHI OR HAMBURGER?
SUSHI!!! yummy :D....plus I don't eat red meat.

19. WHO DID YOU RECEIVE THIS FROM?
multiple people really...Angela and Shauna I know of for sure...

20. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLOWER?
Lilacs!!!! I LOOOOVE them!! and Lily's...but Lily's can kill cats..so they are nice to look at, but if you plan on having a Cat Party...don't decorate with Lily's!

21. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MEAL?
Turkey Dinner!! Its my absolute FAVOURITE meal!!!

22. WHEN IS YOUR BIRTHDAY?
October 7, 1982

23. WHAT'S YOUR MIDDLE NAME?
Lynne

24. BEACH, CITY, MOUNTAINS OR COUNTRY?
Country

25. SOUP OR SALAD?
probably salad...I'm not really a soup girl...I would never order soup in a restaurant...it seems strange to me...

26. COMPUTER OR CELL PHONE?
well...both I guess...it depends on my mood.

27. POP CORN OR PEANUTS?
Man...I don't like either...I'll eat them rarely...but they really don't float my boat...

28. WINE, BEER OR WHISKEY?
ummm...Girly Drinks :)

30. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU SAW IN A THEATER
Constantine...I saw it tonight...freaky, but goooood :D

31. LAST RESTAURANT IN WHICH YOU ATE?
WaZooBies on Commercial for lunch today...it was good :)

32. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW?
oh God....I can't choose...Probably Simpsons, Family Guy and Gilmore Girls

33. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE?
Do you know me at all?!? I can't choose movies!!!!!!!! But...I did LOOOOVE Finding Neverland!

34. WHAT DID YOU EAT FOR BREAKFAST?
today? nothing...but when I do..its Granola and Yogurt...so yummy

35. WHAT INSPIRES YOU?
ummm...probably literature...I always find I read something and it totally strikes a chord with me and I'll forever remember the quote.

36. WHAT CHARACTERISTIC OF YOURS DO YOU MOST DESPISE?
Ummm...I wish I could regain some of the confidence I had when I was younger...I think when I was in a serious relationship I became comfortable and lost some of it...now I'm trying to find it again.

37. IF YOU WON THE LOTTERY, WHAT WOULD YOU SPEND IT ON?
well...I proabbly wouldn't do anythign until I finish school...then I'd travel and give alot to my family and friends and then more to charities...but yeah...I don't think I'd change my lifestyle too much...I'd just make it easier.

38. FROM THE PEOPLE YOU WILL EMAIL THIS TO, WHO'S MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND
I'm not sending this to anyone...

39. WHO'S LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
see above...

40. WHERE WILL YOU RETIRE?
umm...I don't know...I"ll figure that out in like 100 years...;)

I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!

MELFIB
Originally uploaded by mellalynne.

WOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not to toot my own horn, but toot toot!! I figured it out!!! I actually had to use teh mac program to do it...stupid Hello!!!

Happy New Year

Happy New Year!

It seems as though everyone around me is sadden by the world at the beginning of 2005. While I do believe that there are many things to be sad and depressed about that this point, I think what really makes me so sad is the complete loss of faith and strength in the world today. By faith I don't mean anytype of religious faith...I mean the faith in ourselves and the faith in the people around us. I see so much of this in the world today...We are allowing ourselves to be led around blindly by the hand, not questioning anything. Beyond this we automatically assume that everyone is trying to hurt us or take advantage of us.

Before I left B.C. for Christmas, Michelle and I were sitting the the Wendy's Parking lot eating Spicy Chickens and there was a young homeless man sitting on the divider on the highway holding a sign that was begging for food. I believe it said that he hadn't eaten for 3 days, but I can't be sure...I think its so sad that I've become so accustomed to turning a blind eye to signs much like that one that I just sat there...talking with Michelle....eating my Chicken....complaining about all the crap in my life...I didn't even think that maybe this poor guy WAS actually hungry...I thought the typical 'city' response; 'He's trying to take advantage'...or 'If I give to one, I'll have to give to them all...I can't afford that!!'. Then a man drove up and parked beside us and gave this guy a bag of food from Wendy's. Michelle and I watched in surprise...and then I watched in shame...The man turned and walked from the guy with a you're welcome then got in his car and drove away. The young guy took the food with gratitude...it was written all over his face. The man must have seen him and had gotten off of the BUSY highway...paid for the meal with his own money...and then walked through traffic to give it to the guy and then fought his way home during the busy rush hour. He had enough faith in himself to do this, when I couldn't even do it when I was going through teh drive thru anyway and sitting there anyway.

Anyhoo...my point to this is I just think that we all have to stop thinking the worse about people and about our world. I read Jen's blog a couple minutes ago and what I responded, I think, fits this very well so I'm gonna copy it here. Maybe I should get off my soapbox now, but I think instead that we should all push people to live with faith in themselves and the world and from there live with freedom. Here's my response...

Hey dude
Its hard sometimes to maintain any kind of faith in the people around us. They leave us for other people, other opportunities, and other surroundings. I think the only way people can really get through life without being jaded and bitter is to see that even though some people choose to leave, even more people choose to stay. You can't focus on the crap stuff and expect to be happy. Even the crap stuff is bound to have some good in it. I.E. Southeast Asia is a horrific example that no matter what man can do, Nature can do worse...but look at how the world is pulling together to make any kind of difference. There are people who have no money and no hope, but still find $5 to donate to the people who have less. Regardless of if people believe we have a higher creator or is they believe we simply evolved on our own, it doesn't matter...what matters is that fact that the evolution of human beings is one that has a lot of crap in it...but ultimately all of the things that mark a turning point in our evolution are also points where we see the human race pulling together to lend strength. Don't let yourself get down on all the crap that you see in the world today, in your life today, or even your mind today...instead look and find the examples of this human race spirit. In the end, the universe and our world tends to make everything right, and everything come out even. Even if we don't see it right away, it will happen...